Welcome to the beginning of your communication overhaul, we are happy to have you. We wanted to take an appropriate amount of time to welcome you to the material you are about to embark on, and why I chose to make this course. Happy learning, and happy communicating.

Lasting change starts with a healthy and confident foundation. In this chapter, we will begin constructing the foundational aspects of your new communication style.

Before we begin to lay the bricks of the house, we have to first have a vision in mind. To begin this process effectively, we need to iron out what is it you want to get out of this course when it is completed.

We can only improve so far when focusing solely on our strengths. We need to challenge ourselves to grow within areas where we may struggle. This section is all about the process of identifying where our communication difficulties are.

We all have needs. In order to be a healthy communicator, and person for that matter, we have to learn that our needs have to be advocated for. We have to begin to understand how to get those needs met.

To take ownership of your experience is to empower the remainder of your journey in this course. Without it, we become passengers rather than leaders. It is time to take the leadership role within your communication.

The body will always communicate to others. We are all social animals, and how we present to others is profoundly important. A large part of that is what we are saying with our bodies, so it is time to let them speak well on our behalf.

Patience is mandatory for peace and inner harmony. Patience will allow others the time it takes to truly learn your new style of communicating, and it will allow your internal systems and structures the safety to change over time.

The longest lasting implementations of healthy change comes with the dedication to simple tasks executed daily. This section gives a number of such items to pay attention to, and begin attuning your focus to regularly.

We all will need to ask for something at some point in the very near future. This chapter will help alleviate the anxiety and pressure surrounding this task. My hope for you is that you begin to get so much more need fulfillment, and life can become easier as a result.

To get into this boat with me and experience this type of change, there are shifts and changes we need to make in how we currently approach asking for things. This sections details those mind shifts, and will assist you in maintaining a healthy, productive focus.

When asking for anything, we have to start with our perspective, and our views. We do this by leveraging I statements. I statements are statements that start with what you are observing, feeling, noticing, etc. We will replace those ineffective you and why statements over time!

This section’s goal is to give you a system to master over time. When we have a guide, we can begin to practice. This is my version of this. Over thousands of clinical hours, this is how I train all of my fellow clinicians, clients, and consulting clients to ask for anything they need.

When asking for your needs to be fulfilled, there will be moments of challenge and difficulty. These are normal and expected, as we are all human after all. The objective of the revolving door is to explain to you that we have the ability to softly and skillfully return to our request time and time again.

This is the first DBT Skills Work Section: DEAR MAN. The following sections will round out the trio of skills, and give you well-formulated handouts to be backups to practice with.

GIVE is formulated to instruct individuals on how they can communicate with individuals in a gentle, loving manner. This is used to help bolster your learning by providing you more examples of different structures you can follow.

FAST is a system of communication utilized for when you need to stand your ground, represent your values, or stick up for yourself if you feel disrespected.

The word no has a myriad of different attachments to it. For some, it is their strongest word, and for others, it might as well not be in their vocabulary. Our goal within this chapter is to healthily balance out your usage of the word no.

Some people will always want an explanation from you. Some of those individuals are genuinely curious, some are just trying to convince you to say yes. This section details why the single word no can sometimes be the perfect one word sentence.

My no used to be non-existent. Now it is one of my strongest words I use. We all have to assess the power this word has, and this section begins to illustrate this concept.

Saying no is a concept that we can very easily adapt our communication blueprint from earlier around. This section speaks on how one can do this, and how to use it effectively.

When you are presented with a situation in which you want to say no, how provoking is that situation for you? Do you have a negative attachment to the word no? This section aims to shed some light on these concepts, and to help expand our idea around the word no.

When talking about communication, context is everything. When we are assessing when and how to implement our no, we need to take stock of the contextual moment we are in. This section dives deeper into this concept.

Discipline is very in vogue right now. Everywhere you look, it is being talked about. I am no exception. The reason being is that if we learn to hone our ability to tell ourselves no when faced with things we know will set us back, we actively improve right there in that moment.

Collaboration is the lifeblood in which healthy connection builds. To choose to collaborate and not compete directly with someone in your communication journey is to offer them a bridge into mutual growth. This section aims to further illustrate the impact of collaboration and competition on communication outcomes.

Boundaries are essentials components of a sense of communication safety. When we take the time to finely craft our boundaries, we can effectively navigate challenging environments, and also, can keep ourselves safe during the interaction.

We all need to evaluate and analyze our why on a consistent basis. If we are not guided by any sort of compass, how do we know where to travel? This section provides insight into why this concept accelerates healthy communication.

Maintenance is an act of love. To keep something running in acceptable condition is an undertaking we do because we know it is worth it in the long run. Boundaries are the same. They need to be kept up, they need to be well maintained and examined.

The communication blueprint is an ever growing concept that I love to build upon like a modular hub of skills usage. This way, we can always feel like we are building upon our foundation. This section details how to do so with our boundaries.

Indirectness and passivity rewards you with disappointment, resentment and eventual contempt. Directness on the other hand rewards you with confidence, actionable results, clarity and agency. This section works to try and convince you of these concepts.

Being direct is a gift to your past, present and future self. The reason being is that the only way to effective get what you need, is to directly pursue them. I do not want your life, and your communication journey to be subject to chance and wishful thinking. I want your success determined by your own ability and execution of these concepts.

Everyone makes mistakes - I make plenty. We need to learn how and when to effectively and authentically offer an apology to someone else. We also have to learn how to implement the change required to make an apology a lived experience, not just words that will fade to time.

Everyone has differing perspectives, opinions, values, ideas, etc. You are going to find yourself engaged within conversation with someone you disagree with eventually, so we need to know how to healthily and respectfully have that conversation.

For some of us, there are narratives we carry around internally that we are some bad, broken thing. That could NOT be further from the truth. We are all born good enough and worthy of receiving pleasant loving treatment. This section begins to shine a light on these concepts.

To remain open, and to remain curious is to remain healthy and alive. We will all change, it is impossible to stop. How are you embracing those concepts, how willing are you to strive for something new.

You never have to go about this journey alone. Reach out to me via the website when you have questions. You will do great with all this new material, and we are all excited to experience not only your communication growth, but your growth as a person.